Emotional Dumpsite

my readings are everywhere. there’s no place for me to lie down. one
look at my place and you’ll surely say it’s a dumpsite. opened books,
scratch papers, nonsense readings, crumpled papers, and notebooks are strewn all over my bed. bags with undecipherable contents, used and
freshly washed clothings, missing pairs of shoes littered my part of
the room. there’s no time to clean up, no time to fix everything.

Haggard last days…

it’s three am and i am still sitting in front of my pc
staring into the blank screen. actually, it was filled with words that
were immediately deleted because most of it, if not all, made no sense. and
here i am, starting all over again. visiting other sites would do me no
good that’s why i try to limit myself to the online thesaurus and
english-tagalog dictionary. so much for being a so-called smart-ass,
huh? (note: i am NOT a smart ass) still, these were of no help because my mind’s empty. it just
keeps on chanting SLEEP, BED, SLEEP, BED, SLEEP, BED…

Haggard last days…

i am in the verge of breaking into tears. i did just so. right in front
of someone who means nothing to me, in the middle of everyone to see.
Fortunately, not everyone was there. I cried because of joy. Yeah, at
least some of those tears were tears of joy. But i think most of it was
a combination of desperation, loneliness, weariness, homesickeness…
oh, every possible negative feeling that you can think of.

Haggard last days…