Emotional Dumpsite

the usual smile,
thrown my way.
thought it was something special,
naturally, i am now floating.
     one lingering look,
     assuming you are telling me something.
     it swept me off my feet,
     naturally, i am now floating.
a nod of acknowledgement,
we we meet by the pathway.
can’t help but give a big smile,
but of course, you’re the reason why i’m floating.
     a single pat on the back
     that you’ve given me unconsciously.
     liked it when you touched me,
     so, now, i am floating.
now, i’m falling fast,
can”t help, but i think you’re rash.
don’t want to do something.
i just want to feel the crash!!!

Two weeks of unrest.
Literally without sleep.
Yeah, maybe an hour or two in a day.
But that’s it.
Always on the perky side,
     even if the body is drained of energy,
     even when the mind refuses to work properly.
Slaving in front of the computer.
With bulging eyebags to complement the bangag air.
Eating junk to keep you awake,
     even if it’ll just add up to your freakin’ heavy weight.
After all of these, the output’s just a few pages and a quarter of an hour’s worth.
Expecting, rather, HOPING, that these would be the last week of unrest.
But, reality sinks in.
Thesis it.
It will knock you hard and kill you fast.
And no matter what, you’ll have to embrace it with open arms.

i came by this site while looking for christian articles. if you have time, kindly visit this site.

for believers: this would help strengthen your faith more.
for the non-believers: it would make you think twice (i pray).

So anyway, there’s no harm in just checking it out right? Right!

Enjoy.

http://www.christiangeology.com/

 if you have been reading my blog since day one (and im sure you havent), you might think that this blog is full of bitterness… darkness… yep, i agree.
     almost all of the entries here were written out of misery…? bitterness…? heartache…? but now, my beloved reader, i want you to know that i want to start anew. i assure you, all the bitterness are gone now. i threw them all away , along with the memories that’s not worth dwelling with…
     this blog will remain dark (dark because i like red on black background, or white on black, or any neon colors on black), but my next entries won’t be. still, i won’t erase evrything that i’ve written in the past because these the only memories that i’ve left that i think is worth keeping.
     you can still read them though and feel free to comment on it.
(grammar: yes i know it sucks, but this is my page, so what can you do about it?hehe… content: a bit shallow i suppose… basta, say something, write something, do something!!! )

it wasnt supposed to be an ordinary day. what the heck, it was my birthday! but nothing out of the ordinary happened. sheesh, talk about great monumental events taking place on your birthday…

it’s a wednesday. i haVE no classes on wednesdays. i was supposed to go to rpn9 for my internship but i had decided to give myself a break. sort of like a present to myself. (but i’ve been giving myself a break from internship for the past weeks now, that’s why i’d never get to finish my internship). so, anyway, i was just in my room, as usual. i woke up at the usual time that i wake up, around 8am. when i went down for breakfast, i thought that ‘monumental thing’ was gonna happen right then and there, because the badettes greeted me a happy birthday loud enough for the whole dormitory to hear. fortunately (or unfortunately, depends on how you look at it), HE was there. so, i was, like, expecting that he would greet me a happy birthday, too. but that ‘monumental event’ didn’t happen. so it was like, ‘yeah, right, asa pa joyce!’. i was even thinking that if he would greet me, then it we really are MFEO (meant for each other). like duh. again, ‘yeah right, asa pa joyce’.

so anyway, after breakfast, as usual, i’ve got nothing to do so i tried doing my thesis… but to no avail. text messages kept on coming. and, again, i was waiting for the text from another HIM. and, yes, it did arrive but with no impact. i mean, yes, there was a message, but it’s just an ordinary message with an abbreviated greeting at the end of the msg. he didnt even bother to personalize his greeting. talk about making effort.

at least some unexpected people greeted me on my birthday. but there were just some people who failed to remember you on your birthday. i mean, how hard is it to remember a friend’s birthday? i mean, it’s just one day out of 365, right? i’m  not being bitter about it. i’m cool. it’s just heartbreaking. haha. no, really. it’s really fine. (im just planning on not greeting them on their bday!haha mean me!)

i had lunch, and then locked myself in my room whole day. i already had a gift from my parents. but what i really want was to spend my birthday with them. but i know that’s impossible. so, reality check joyce!

while i was waiting for the night to arrive, i was planning on where to treat my friends. and i decided to go back to where i celebrated my bday last year. at least, then, we had fun and we were filled. so i took them there.

we just ate. and went home. and went to sleep. that’s how ordinary my birthday was.

but thanks to my friends, they went out of their ways to make it extra special. i received a cake form them! woohoo! i’ve been wishing for a birthday cake for years now, ‘coz you see, i had no birthday cake for my last four birthdays here in UP. and now, here it is… my own birthday cake. given to me by the extra special people in my life right now. my friends…

<———— MY BIRTHDAY CAKE!!!

come to think of it, my day, BIRTHDAY, wasn’t that ordinary anymore…

if only my family were there. then, i could not ask for more.